Monday, November 30, 2020

ADVENT: The Bidding Prayer

 


I LOVE ! The Biddings ! and the one at Advent is a stunner, we heard it at the top of the service yesterday. 

I was reminded this morning, reading a quote from John Henry Newman, just how BAD humans are at "being," how bad we are when it comes to +waiting, and just the idea of +change, especially in light of the fact that our sacred writings talk a lot about both those things. And now here we are with an entire season dedicated to both ... 

"Advent is a time of waiting, it is a time of joy ! because the coming of Christ is not only a gift of grace and salvation, but the coming of Christ is also a time of commitment, because it motivates us to 

live the present 

as a time of responsibility and vigilance."

... . The grace and peace of God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ be with you ...

THE BIDDING PRAYER:

"It is time for us to wake out of sleep !

for deliverance is nearer to us now than it was when first we believed.

It is far on in the night; day is near !

Let us therefore cast off the deeds of darkness

and put on our armor as soldiers of the light !

... My sisters and brothers, we enter today the solemn season of Advent in which the Church bids us prepare to celebrate the coming of Christ;

a coming that we recall in the Child of Bethlehem;

a coming that we experience in the gift of his Spirit, in the bread of the Eucharist, in the joy of human lives that are shared;

a coming we wait for when God gathers up all things in Christ.

Let us in this holy season reflect on the coming of Christ who brings light to the world.

Let us leave behind the darkness of sin,

walk in the light that shines on our path,

and renew within ourselves the hope of glory to which he beckons us.

And as we turn towards the light,

let us have on our hearts all those who see no light,

for whom all is darkness and despair.

Let us pray that they too may be illumined by Christ who is our light."


The Book of Occasional Services • 2003 
Conforming to General Convention 2003
2
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Commercial or large-scale reproduction, or reproduction for sale,
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Sunday, November 29, 2020

Stations of Advent

 


Advent stations | Ancestors of Christ

Opening prayer 0:09

The First Station: Adam & Eve 1:09

Walk to The Second Station 3:00

The Second Station: Abraham & Sarah 4:00

Walk to The Third Station 5:31

The Third Station: Joshua & Rahab 6:31

Walk to The Fourth Station 7:58

The Fourth Station: Boaz & Ruth 8:58

Walk to the Fifth Station 10:22

The Fifth Station: David & Bathsheba

Walk to the Sixth Station 12:53

The Sixth Station: Mary & Joseph 13:53

Walk to Final Meditations 15:41

1 of 3 Collect from Times and Seasons: Advent, CoE,

2 of 3 Collect for the First Sunday of Advent, BCP,

3 of 3 Orthodox prayer for the second Sunday before Christmas 16:41


Advent is a penitential season that begins on the fourth Sunday before December 25th, which is called Advent Sunday in our tradition. It might be hard to believe that Advent is a penitential season today, but in ages past there were strict fasting rules and the liturgy had a somber tone just as it does today in Lent.  Most often the Gloria, the song sung  to the shepherds by the angels in the field outside Bethlehem, was omitted from the liturgy and only returned at the First Mass of Christmas. In the Western Church the season was certainly established by the late 5th century and the Council  of Tours in 567 ordered all monks to fast on every day of December.

During Advent the Church looks back on the whole history of salvation where God reaches out to His people again and again to be in relationship with them. The birth of Christ is God’s breaking into human history in a profound and physical way by becoming a human being. Advent also looks forward to Christ’s Second Coming in glory to fulfill the promise of the Kingdom of God for all people.  In the same  way that we prepare for Christmas and the celebration of Jesus’ birth in Bethlehem, we should prepare for his return on that last day.

=-=-=-=

We are blessed to have some works of art to help us explore the mystery of the Advent season. Simon Carr and Joan Elizabeth Goodman have created images of some of the ancestors of Christ. We are invited to look back at the people who were chosen by God to be part of the family of Jesus. They are so much like us. None of them is perfect, yet God calls each of them to do amazing things.

Thank you to Cindy Brome for the beautiful photographs of the stations.

=-=-=-=

The St Luke’s Art Guild

The Art Guild is an ad hoc group  of  parishioners,  who  are also artists, collaborating on different projects to challenge the religious imaginations of the parish.

James Middleton and Simon Carr have both created their own 8 scene Stations of the Cross series for the parish which we have used during Lent in the past few years. In 2016 we had a group of fourteen artists, including three young artists, who had each created one of the traditional fourteen Stations of the Cross which hung in the church nave from Ash Wednesday until Holy Saturday.

The guild is responsible for the ofrenda that is set up in late October by the columbarium where we remember and honor our dead. The guild also sets up the Christmas Crèche with the assistance of the St Luke’s flower and altar guilds that is such a beautiful part of our celebration of Christmas.

Suggestions for new exhibits are the Prophets of the Old Testament for Advent, the men and women of the Early Church for the Season of Pentecost, and Saints of the Month where one or two saints from the church calendar are celebrated with a selection of artworks on the walls of the church nave during the month where that saint’s feast day is celebrated.

Monday, November 2, 2020

3 Minutes on The Golden Rule at Election Time

 

3 minutes to hear some guidance from the sacred writings and our traditions, from a couple of the handful of people I trust the care of my soul to, please? Video link at the bottom.
the Very Rev. Canon Daniel Ade:
Good morning, everyone, and welcome to All Saints Day. We're so glad that you could be here with us this morning.
For many months now we've been having a series of speakers come, called The Saint John Speaks Out Program, and we speak out about the issues of the day, and how we ground ourselves facing those issues in our tradition.
I've been thinking a lot about the lesson last week where Jesus tells us how to love our neighbor. We're called to love God, and then love our neighbor, and they're quite the same, and it seems for many people unclear just how you love your neighbor.
But Jesus is quoting Leviticus, and I think there's some clarity in there for us as we face this time of uncertainty. We're on the very eve of an election that will be very difficult. It might be difficult for weeks, and there will be lots of temptations for us ... to other people, so listen what to do what Jesus says when he quotes Leviticus:
“Do not hate a fellow neighbor in your heart. Rebuke your neighbor frankly, so that you will not share in their guilt … “
and here's what we all need to listen to … well, EYE need to listen to …
“… do not seek revenge, or bear a grudge against anyone among your neighbors, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord …"
and one of the things that really struck me is that the word “neighbor” can also mean “citizen’ …
“You should love your fellow ‘citizen’ … don't bear a grudge against your fellow ‘citizen’ … don't seek vengeance against your fellow ‘citizen’”
who might have a real reason to disagree with you, maybe even passionately, but in this time of anxiety we might all be seeking revenge, and to other people who disagree with us.
the Very Rev. Dr. Canon Mark Kowalewski:
The other thing I think we need to keep in mind as we come to this week is the image of what greets us every time we enter the doors of Saint John's, and that is the baptismal font, because that is the source of our life in Christ.
We are God's wonderful, beloved, adopted children, in one family … no matter who we are, or where we come from, we are God's beloved children now.
But that identity comes with a responsibility, and, so, if you have not voted, it is your Christian Obligation to go out and vote.
We aren't telling you who to vote for, but simply to vote, and to know that many people of differing points of view also share in that same baptismal water that we all are swimming in, and to know that we are God's beloved, and as Father Dan says, we need to love our neighbor as our self.
So may God's rich blessing be with you as we come to this momentous week in the life of our nation.
FATHER DAN:
“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and soul and mind and strength, and you shall love your neighbor, your fellow citizen, as yourself.”

Two Minutes of Hate? Or the Foundation for a Day of Praise & Thanksgiving

 


THIS CANNOT BE HOW WE START OUR DAY ! We've become addicted, I have. I turn on my banked copy of Rachel, I check my twitter feed as the cathode ray tube warms up, and I get my "Two Minutes of Hate" watching in, only it's an hour and a half before I turn to my prayers. Who are we going to be, people who turn FIRST to offer thanksgivings for a brand new day, brand new breathing, all this provision and luxury and excess? or people who turn to these abominations and lies that will fill the rest of our day with fear and loathing and dread and distrust. Let's be mindful please, I say to myself for the protection of my own soul and spirit. Times seem like they're going to be rough until next year, so let's be mindful to be kinder to ourselves, especially first thing in the morning. xoxo

"The horrible thing about the Two Minutes Hate was not that one was obliged to act a part, but that it was impossible to avoid joining in.

Within thirty seconds any pretence was always unnecessary.

A hideous ecstasy of fear and vindictiveness, a desire to kill, to torture, to smash faces in with a sledge hammer, seemed to flow through the whole group of people like an electric current, turning one even against one's will into a grimacing, screaming lunatic.

And yet the rage that one felt was an abstract, undirected emotion which could be switched from one object to another like the flame of a blowlamp." ~ George Orwell, 1984.

Thursday, September 17, 2020

2020-09-17 New Moon in Virgo, 7am eastern

 


(p.s., If the concept of "God" is not your thing, please forgive me and take the next few paragraphs as allegory and a brief survey of how other people celebrate this most auspicious occasion of a new moon in Virgo at the end of summer. It's just such an exciting moment in the history of the world, and all the Virgo in me is bubbling through the top of my skull and it's hard to contain myself :-)

And p.p.s., "God" is the word I use to name The Source, The Universe, whatever That is that is eternal, that has always, will always exist, and that piece of That which I know we feel is inside us, that resonates inside us, that reverberates inside us with the That's "Cosmic Hum". Right now, it's humming to create in us not only clean hearts, but a Brand New Me.

And lastly, when I say that "God is closer to us right now than at other times during the year," I mean the veil is thin between us and Eternity. You know the orbits of the planets are elliptical which is how we're sometimes closer to the Sun for summer and farther away for winter? this month, right now and here in time, the veil is thinner between us and Eternity, and all the planets are aligned to offer us the most aid and the most energy to Get 'Er Done ... The Cosmic Visitation. xoxo Sew ... without further AhDew ... )

It may be a new moon, but we're also at a time of last things, the last month of summer, the last month of the Hebrew calendar, but the tips of our toes are also standing on the starting line of a whole new personal rebirth. The entire universe is poised, right at this second, to manifest a whole new beginning for us personally, a whole new world for us personally, a pat on the back, a hand up, and a "here's the key to the executive wash room" sort of affair.

Guess what else. This month? In the Hindu calendar this year? This is an EXTRA month we're given, an extra chance, a month in our lives for free! because it's a lunar calendar and every few years it needs it to align with the solar one. And it just so happens its happening now at a new moon in Virgo.

What are we going to do with a FREE month, extra time which so many, at the end of their lives, have yearned for. This month is so special, so holy, that no specific festivals are held ... we are to embrace this month for deep meditation, quiet spiritual exercises like various methods of fasting (from fruit or dairy or meat or anything for a minute, an day, the month), performing extra prayers and rituals, what ever can help us make the best use of this extra time to catch up on our relationship with the Divine.

Interestingly, Adhik Maas 2020, this extra month, is occurring in the Hebrew month of Elul which is always treated as special time set aside to deepen our relationship with the Divine.

The Hebrew month of Elul marks the beginning of the end of the Jewish Year and it has a festal atmosphere with shofars blowing every day to announce to all within hearing distance that Rosh Hashanah is only a month away.

Elul is associated with the constellation of Virgo, and with the Tribe of Gad. Virgo is the Mutable Earth, Transformative Manifestation, sign, whose function is that of sifting, analyzing and choosing that which is useful, while discarding that which, while perhaps pretty or pleasant, does not serve the highest purpose.

Virgo is often relentless, and you may feel yourself experiencing high tides of feeling a need to clean everything, get rid of junk, needing to get on your Honey-Do lists, needing to revive your exercise schedule. Her best attributes are being analytical, health-conscious, literary, logical, loyal, meticulous, tidy, and her shadow side, on her worst days, she is picky, prudish, relentless, accusatory, and very very critical.

The Hebrew word "gad" could be translated as “a troop,” which is fitting for this Mercury-ruled month during which we strengthen ourselves spiritually, like soldiers preparing for battle, to prepare for the upcoming Days of Awe, the ten days starting with Rosh Hashanah and ending with Yom Kippur (Yamim Noraim).

Rosh Hashanah, the head of the year, is the Jewish New Year, the day of raising a noise, shouting and blasting and singing and dancing. Yom Kippur, ten days later, is the holiest day of the year in Judaism, is also known as the Day of Atonement with its central themes of atonement and repentance.

That sounds heavy, baby, but it's not. By the time we get around to those days of repentance, we should be pretty well cleansed. We're given the entire month of Elul to meet God, the KING of the UNIVERSE, in the middle of a field where God stands, waiting to cover us in hugs and kisses. The Cosmic Visitation.

The presence of God is very near to us during this month, on the same plane that we exist upon, as opposed to high and lifted upon a throne as during the High Holidays which come at the end of this month. That closeness is meant to inspire a cleansing ritual, not out of shame, being that close to something so pure, but out of refreshment, knowing that we are completely enveloped in love and acceptance and that the entire universe is solidly behind us in any endeavor we take on.

God standing in the middle of a field, seeing us come from far off, jumping up and down, waiting for us to fall in to an embrace. After we've spent this month with God, cleansing ourselves in this spiritual shower, and knowing how silly all of the guilt we're carrying is, no matter how well deserved, in the big scheme of things, and in light of the fact that the past is past and time is short, can't we just regroup, grow, promise not to be such a complete butt-head, and try to move on more graciously?

This is a time for serious introspection and thanks heaven, Virgo is there with a clipboard and a checklist waiting to take inventory and tidy everything up.

The alignment of the planets in the configurations they will manifest throughout next January have never really been recorded and won't occur again for thousands of years.

Seriously.

The two biggie planets which have an enormous influence over everything in the cosmos, Saturn and Pluto, are having a gay 'ole time this year, and they are coming back together in a configuration they were in at the BEGINNING of the year, so everything old is gonna be new again, we're going to revisiting The Way We Were, so you know better now, go out and get some toilet paper.

Remember how tense and oppressive and overbearing and controlling all that energy was? You went through it before, what did you learn. How will you deal, what were your the strategies that worked best.

Now that Virgo's around, eating your feelings isn't going to bring the same satisfaction. She's gonna make you work out, she's gonna make you weigh your food and take your vitamins, she's gonna wanna take step class ... just let go and let her rule because you'll always come out better and healthier on the other side of a run around with Virgo.

Good news is, with all that Saturn and Pluto revival, combined with everything else that's transpiring in the heavens, there WILL be a finalizing, a release, the beginning of the end, the breaking down of "old structures, old paradigms," old oppressive energies that no longer serve us, energies that feel too strict, too burdensome, too tight ... it's like we've been kind of caged up in a lot of ways.

So Here We Are:
we HAVE been doing our homework,
we HAVE been making our lists,
we HAVE taken the first steps in to our new life,
but all of a sudden there was a pause in the universe, remember Mars?
We were on a good trot but now we're sort of suspended.
Well guess what, We're Off ! Here we go !
We need to refreshen our focus on what we truly and deeply need, versus what we truly and deeply want and desire, in very specific areas of our lives, and deconstruct what no longer is serving us, or even take what we've learned during this pause and rearrange what works better, that is more in service of what we desire, what is our soul's Truth deep down in our heart of hearts. Maybe not the dream we started out dreaming, but perhaps that whisper of The Dream We Never Dared Dream, The Impossible Dream, the That'll Never Happen Dream.

We've talked about Lunar Nodes before
http://bit.ly/AuntieDaschNodes.
There's also a fabulous fable about them as part of the Hindu pantheon as Rahu and Keto which we talked about before
http://bit.ly/AuntieDaschRahuKetu.

In astrology, the North Node represents the qualities we need to develop in order to grow, while the South Node represents the qualities that come naturally to us ... and that we might rely on too much ... and that we might need to clean up if they're not working for us. Encoded in these nodes is our life's purpose.

These "Nodes Of Fate" usher us directly toward our most fulfilling spiritual life path. They also tell us what skins we must shed in order to get there. Our South Node represents where we're coming from and what we're bringing into this life and all the gifts and qualities that we've already mastered. Oh yeah, and all the crap we're dragging along with us that's no longer serving us, only weighing us down.

The North Node, on the other hand, represents the path that we are growing into through this life, our karmic paths and the lessons we came here to learn, or the language we are learning to speak. It's our destiny. And it's not always going to be easy to embrace, but it will most certainly be spiritually fulfilling when we do.

Every one and a half years, they change signs which already happened in May when we were making our lists that we're using now. The Nodes of Destiny left where they'd been since 2018, and entered Gemini and Sagittarius where they’ll stay until January 18, 2022.

The North Node represents what we need to add to our lives, and it's now in Gemini, which means a focus of energies on intellectual growth, continued work on improving our communication styles, and letting go of anxieties.

Letting go of anxieties.

The South Node, entering Sagittarius, indicates that we’ll have to let go of the urge to be “right” all the time and concentrate on OUR OWN PERSONAL details, rather than forgetting the details when we're looking at the big pretty picture of the future.

The Nodes are opposite one another on The Wheel and they work in harmony to keep us balanced, which is why it’s important to consider them both. Don’t give too much to the future or the past ... instead, we need to work to balance out their energy now as we stand on this moment in eternity trying to bring peace while making sense of the madness.

The coming four weeks indicate the line of greatest development is through pruning and shaping our words and deeds. WORDS HAVE POWER ! Words created the entire Universe ! "LIGHT !" And there was light ... We need to carefully explain to the Universe, in thought, word, and deed, what we are trying to externalize. This is the time to show active care in exercising control over our OWN environment, not to get in to anyone else's crapola, and manage our OWN impulses (especially those which would want us to get in to anyone else's crapola ...). we need to MIND our OWN BUSINESS !

We need to be gorgeous and rise above it all (and step out of the way of the splashes of people stomping about and throwing up wakes of slime and yuck).

We're in a time of unprecedented flux. We're in a season of crosscurrents and conflicts, also an era of inexhaustible inspiration, creativity, with some hard adjustments to make things simpler and easier.

Remember, the more difficult, complex, strenuous we make the tasks we put on ourselves ... the more work WE do ... the less work is required of us ... does that make sense? REALLY buckle down. We need to REALLY re-up our attention to homework, because we finally must realize that irritations don't just go away ... don't just ... disappear ... if we don't make peace with them they come back until we do, so we may just as well roll up our sleeves and get those dishes washed. But also and again, never before has the Universe been poised to offer us so much energy, so much encouragement, so much support.

Let's DO it !

Nodes. Rahu. Ketu.

 


A “node” is "the point at which lines or pathways intersect or branch; a central or connecting point." The moon has two nodes on a theoretical line in the sky called the ecliptic. There is a north node and a south node. Part 2 of our Node discussion offers an origin story of these nodes and you are not going to want to miss it because it’s told from the Hindu pantheon of Vedic astrology (Jyotish) and it explains this all BRILLIANTLY and delightfully.

So in the science of Astronomy, there is an imaginary line on the sky that marks the annual path of the sun. It is the projection of Earth’s orbit onto the celestial sphere. If you picture a beam shining from earth straight through the sun, and then everyone takes a trip for an earth year, it would be the circle drawn by that line on the other side of the sun. It is an essential part of any stargazer’s vocabulary because without its essential theory we wouldn’t be able to easily explain celestial events.

In studies of Astrology, the lunar nodes are the crossing points at which the orbit of the Moon around the earth crosses the ecliptic. Remember, the path of the moon is on a bit of a tilt, so as it’s moving on the path of its orbit, on the FAR side of the earth it’s said to be in it’s ascent, the ascending node, the "north" node, and coming back 'round it's coming to it's "south" node or the descending node.



The general Astrological theory behind the significance of the Nodes of the Moon suggests that we all have some underdeveloped and overdeveloped aspects in our character. The Nodes of the Moon point us to these specific qualities: the South Node, when the moon is lazily on it's descent, suggests our overdeveloped character traits, our lazy, fall-back positions, the knee-jerk reactions we have, our often mostly unattractive go-to postures, those personality mannerisms which very may well undermine our lives, they certainly do our development, if we hold on to these traits just because we're lazy, just because we need to feel security, and, in often in reality, just because we can't let go or won't get off our ass to better ourselves. The North Node suggests the qualities that we need to develop in order to find inner balance, to reach our potential, to better ourselves and thus, the world. The Nodes of the Moon can also suggest personal karmic imbalance. If we over-emphasize and fall back on the qualities of our South Node, for instance, at the expense of developing our North Node, we may have a difficult time feeling personally successful to say nothing of having any feelings of general accomplishment. Whether or not we consciously work on these lessons, events in our lives are likely to force us to confront them at one time or another, so why don’t we take scheduled inventories to clean ourselves up throughout the year, hmm?




In Hinduism we believe in One God, that's all. That one God, however, has lots of attributes and so each one is given its own representative personage for illustrative purposes. The mythology is terrific and there are tons of different stories about single incidents which occur, like this one. So ...

There are different levels of deities, some seeking goodness and blessings, some seeking power and domination, some good, some bad, they get jealous, the have battles, they have supernatural powers and weapons, they cheat, they play tricks on one another, they're sneaky, and wonderful and horrible. Sometimes the evil ones will trick the good ones and gain boons and special blessings that can't be taken back because they were won fair and square. 

So, right off the bat in the pantheon we've got the TRIMURTI, or the TRIUMVIRATE, the three attributes of God which are responsible for the Creation of the Universe (Brahma), the upkeep of the Universe (Vishnu), and the natural endings of cycles, like autumn (Shiva) ... 

Once upon a time, Vishnu decided to have a party ! And he invited each of the Deities who represented the Seven (shuddup) planets to come to the party so that they could church up the Ocean of Milk to make it release Amrita, the nectar of immortality. (again, shuddup.) It took a millennium. Lots of stuff was released during the churning, there were battles and wars, but those are stories for some snowy night by the fire. Most of the tales say that Dhanvantari, the god of medicine, decided that The Churning Was Done and had produced the Amrita, but the demons snatched it ! and refused to give it back.

So Vishnu appeared in his only feminine incarnation, as the enchantress Mohini, the most beautiful female form in the universe then or ever, and tricked everyone in the heavens, the deities seeking power and the dieities seeking goodness and blessings, to sit down in rows and Mohini would distribute the Elixir of Immortality to each and every person individually. Rahuketu, a Rakshasha (a man-eating demon), who is in appearance a great and mighty dragon or snake, disguised himself as a deity in order that HE might become immortal, and he snuck in and sat down and received some of the Nectar of Eternal Life.

The Sun ! and the Moon ! saw this ! and they screamed at Mohini ! to stop ! but by that time Rahuketu was already immortal. Vishnu was LIVID ! and pulled out his sword and chopped the demon in half ! Wuhl, the demon is immortal ! so his head became known as Rahu and his tail became known as Ketu. When they saw how angry they had made Vishnu (again and still, shuddup), they did penance for many years and were eventually given status as "planets". They are the powerful force that operates in our lives to control the karmic influences and situations as they sit on the intersection of the moon's transit across the ecliptic.


Monday, June 29, 2020

Mommie Dearest




#LentUnEdited This is NOT a cry for help, I'm so good, I'm just sharing something that took maybe THREE SECONDS this morning, but it happens every couple of years and I thought I'd SHARE it. LOVE you !

Mommy was a "manic depressive," which we now know as bi-polar disorder, but we wouldn't have known that then either, because thinking was on her side, you don't GO to a doctor, 'cause when you GO to a doctor they find CANCER, then they cut you open, and it spreads all over, and "next thing you know, you come home dead."

Praise God I've managed all these years to keep fortified my barbican, but sometimes I can see shadows of the cousins of the spirits who tortured my mother all those years, I feel them trying to creep up in underneath my lungs, cloud my head, rob me of a morning's pleasure, like Dementors, I guess, and I've got some quick seconds to "chase all the clouds away ..."

There are some mornings I'll do some little thing, one of the repetitive tasks to keep the balls in the air, keep people alive, keep the train on the track ... this morning it was after I'd fed the kitties, reaching for a bowl to do the next thing, and then it sorta hit the front part of my brain and curled me over for a second ... thinking how this day was no better than the last, and what's the point of it all, and i'm never gonna be able to dragazz through the same old tired routine that takes over every morning after I'd fed the kitties, reaching for a bowl ... doesn't matter anyway, the day's just gonna fly by with nothing to show for it, just like the last one, and can't I get a moment's peace just to sit down and breathe?

and I thought,
you dirty thankless bastards, chalky, tacky, dull thieves of light,
you desperate spirits of ill will, you're not gonna feed on MY soul and steal MY joy,
be gone ! you have no power here !

and I picked up that bowl like it was a priceless work of art given me by god's own hand,
and I called BACK to mind every. single. one. of the MULTITUDE of blessings i've been given in this incarnation,
and remembered the responsibility i've been given to tend to my corner of god's magnificent garden
and here we are to sing and dance and make Merry like Christmas, mereh.

I found this poem a decade ago by Vicky Richards, and it's one of those things you think, "OH ! I'll cut this out and send it to Mommy, I wonder if it would give her release, if it would help soothe her troubled spirit," and then you realise Mommy's been dead for many years, and you wipe your eyes and move on. I thought that too about NEXT2NORMAL and the truth of I MISS THE MOUNTAINS, 'cause I really think it addresses how exciting and comforting feeling manic is versus feeling nothing at all ...

I've never wanted to go back and be young, relive my past, it was too painful trying to get here where I am today,
and I've never wanted to go back with the knowledge I have now because I know you can't teach nothin' to nobody nohow,
but my heart will always go out to the old gal who used to sing, "You're gonna miss your big fat mama one of these days," just after she'd say, "don't you worry about that, kid, I'll be dead and rotten by the time that happens ..." xoxo

---> Sometimes, you’d rather sit there and sob into eternity
Than feel a joyful ecstasy.
Your body wracked, your wit’s end is endless and you stay there indefinitely.

Looking over into the gorge, all you want is to throw yourself over, to give in to the pain and live out your days a hollow, hurting skeleton.

But you love the view too much to do it,
So you stand and you stare
Into the seabed of your tears
All the reasons why
And why not
And the could haves and should haves and days you hated yourself
The things you could not do, the times you were not perfect.

It is an ocean of self loathing full of salty, unrealistic expectation.

But in this sad desert, this raging storm, this churning sea – that is where you find it.
That is where it finds you.
Lying helpless on the ground,
spent and shaking,
eyes shut so tight they may never open again.

All I can feel is the rhythm of my tears pounding out the beat of my life force,
I want it to end,
I never want it to end.

And then one moment you’ve hit a wall
And the world falls away
And then I can feel it.
This tableau still laid out all around me, my hands touch earth and I find a plateau
And above me I can see it.

Myself.

The part of me that is most me, standing there waiting, strong and stoic and full of grace.
A weeping willow with arms outstretched, leaves twining together to lift me, safe, out of the storm.
Waiting to embrace this shivering mess of humanity it says,

“Come here, now, little one. All is not lost. Stay a while with me, you’ll see.”

It is in these moments where I find my strength.
When I hate it all so much that the clouds roll in and the air supply runs out,
When my constant, blessèd life turns into a string of cursed regrets
And good runs away
This is where it runs to.

If you wait long enough, it finds you on the edge

If you listen well enough, it will call you back from the places you wish didn’t exist

If you want it bad enough, you’ll never lose it

So long as you live, it will find you.

But you must live.

To live is more than to just exist.
Pursue. <--

On The Right Track


I spent a little time in high school at the Latter-Day Saints' early morning religious education programs and learned SEW many fascinating things. I was reminded of their POSITIVE interpretation of Adam and Eve's Fall from Grace yesterday during The Rev Dr EMC Kaeton's sermon.

It reminded me of something a pentecostal preacher said to me once, "There is NO WAY to step off God's path for your life, never worry about that. If you leave a ministry, there's a Substitute right around the corner, just like you are taking up for a lack in the universe somewhere else with your new beginning. Do you think any of your choices SURPRISE God? You get the choice, you choose, God lays straight your path with blessings, get it?"

Isaiah says, "You will go out with joy and be led forth by God with peace. God's word be which goes out of My mouth will not return to Me void, useless, without result, without accomplishing what I desire, and without succeeding in the matter for which I sent it."

The Good Doctor said, << We have free will AND the gift of grace, no matter our choice ... You see, my friends, we all have within us a divine spark. Each. And. Every. One. Of. Us. No exceptions. We all have the potential to do enormous good and terrible wrong. It is our choice. And, it is our responsibility. ... Grace to find hope, no matter how dark the future may seem. >>

Don't know if you know it, but Mormon cosmology puts a positive spin on The Fall that I've always found refreshing, and cleared up aye LOT of stuff for me:

It was a necessary step in the plan of this beautiful life we've been given on this earth. If it weren't for The Fall, we wouldn't have these amazing physical bodies; we wouldn't HAVE the right to choose between good and evil. we wouldn't know "opposites." How could we recognize "joy" if we didn't know a life without it. With the "gift" of this choice, God knows The Grateful Ones. We're not mindlessly living in God's blessings, living thoughtlessly, all these blessings as a given; without "lack" how would we know "bounty."

The Fall gives us the opportunity to actively participate in mitzvahs that are God gifts to us: Part One, God offers; Part Two. we mindfully accept; mitzvah complete.

Problem with choosing is, we have to reach out, step out, listen to the still small inner voice that inspires us to try something new. If the worry is ever that our courage will result in lack, then we're not recalling The Sacred Stories ... Mama Will Provide (#OnceOnThisIsland #MusicalComedyDamage), "Jehovah Jireh, my providuh" ...

Speaking of The Sacred Stories, it's just like the Bunjee-Jump Ride Operator says to Selena (in the BioPic #Selena) when she's too scared to leap: "The Hardest Part is The First Step."

We gotta Trust and Fly. We gotta trust that whether we get pushed out of the nest, or whether we decide to step out of the nest, that we're gonna soar, we're gonna fly ... God's palm is right underneath us ... "we have the gift of grace ... no matter our choice ..." xoxo

Monday, June 22, 2020

Grant us our prayers of yearning for healing



<< In the beginning, O God,
you shaped our soul
and set its weave.

You formed our body and gave it breath.
Renew us this day in the image of your love.

O great God, grant us your light.
O great God, grant us your grace.
O great God, grant us your joy this day
and let us be made pure in the well of your health.

O Christ of the road of the wounded,
O Christ of the tears of the broken,
in us and with us the needs of the world.

Grant us our prayers of loving and hoping.
Grant us our prayers of yearning for healing.
Pray for the coming day
and for healing
within and among all people.
Amen. >>

Copyright © J. Philip Newell, Iona

Jesus Loves You



There's a theme this month, and today is its Feast Day and that's The Sacred Heart of Jesus. It boggles my mind that we're always SO ready to turn everything in to some selfish, the prayers for this feast are complete self-mortification when the original intent was LITERALLY Jesus saying, "Hey ! I love you ! ! "

As was taught me, Saint Margaret Mary Alacoque was a child filled with prayers and love for God, and then was living her best life. She came home from a Carnival ball ! one night, and Jesus shows up ! and he reveals to her his huge heart. He's like, "Remember me?" and she's all, "Ohmuhguh, I'm SO SORRY ! I've forgotten you !", and he's, like, "No way! Stop. It's just, I wanted to show you how much love I have in my heart for you and the entire planet ! There was one time in your life you wanted to devote yourself completely to telling the world about God's love for them, but the path you're on now takes you away from that singular charism ... either way's good, but meanwhile, I love you !"

and so she went in to the Visitation Convent at Paray-le-Monial (where, by all reports she wasn't a very good nun but won Miss Congeniality ever year she was alive), and through her prayers experienced levels of mysticism we're still talking about today (Jesus loved to zap her with hand rays, picture in first comment).

So, Jesus loves you, this I know, for Margaret Mary told me so. xoxo

Solstice Solar Eclipse and New Moon 2020 006 20




Total “Ring of Fire” Solar ECLIPSE on the ✜ SOLSTICE ✜ with a NEW MOON at 0 degrees of Cancer, as well as the other alignments present, make this a rare “seed” moment turning point.

In the darkness of this eclipse we are safe to let it all go, to be no-one, no-thing, and yet everything, sure in the knowledge we can make ourselves anew at any moment, contribute to the universe, and know for certain that nothing can steal the essence of who we truly are.

Summer solstice 2020 begins tonight at
5:43 p.m. EDT.
The Solar eclipse starts tonight at
11:45 p.m. EDT Saturday, June 20,
The Solar eclipse peaks at
2:40 a.m. EDT Saturday, June 21, and
The Solar eclipse ends at
5:34 a.m. EDT Sunday June 21st.

This Solar Eclipse marks a powerful change in direction, change in allegiances, change in priorities, and puts us all on the cutting edge of destiny.

The tipping point is not near, it’s here, and it will culminate in December when we are launched in to the freedom of the feminine, air energies of The Age of Aquarius.

We need to remember, whatever we're doing now, each of us individually and all of us collectively, our thinking, our emotional frequency, we are creating a broadcast of the vibration for that new world coming as we emerge from this year, as we emerge from this lockdown, and any other lockdowns that may happen this year, so it's such a precious opportunity that we mustn't waste, and looking around, many of us are doing fantastic jobs at taking great advantage in being creating and sending our light out in to the world.

Looking at eclipses which happened on the days of the Solar equinoxes or solstices shows that these are pivotal years for the world, when it takes a totally new direction.

When we have a Solar Eclipse sandwiched between two Lunar Eclipses like this one (June 5th-6th, this on the 20th-21st, and July 4th-5th), we often see a process of emotional upheaval and purging triggered by the first Lunar Eclipse, followed by a time of radical action and significant events at the Solar Eclipse, followed by a period of emotional repatterning and transformation at the Second Lunar Eclipse.

Productivity is up, intensity is up, the need for self-discipline is up, with Venus swirling forward and Mercury swirling backwards. This Eclipse offers us a turning point as we see the necessity of doing our thing in our own way.

The compulsion to “act” we may feel right now, however, might fall short of our desired outcome if we don’t first turn within to discern the appropriateness of our response. In essence, this Solar Eclipse primes us to think and feel with a greater degree of consciousness, and apply our thoughts and feelings to the conscious act of creating the world we desire.

The seed thoughts and feelings planted at this eclipse will grow strong and vibrant if watered with incisive wisdom, fierce compassion and a robust commitment to birth a new world from the on-going demise of the old one.

As far as is possible, we need to hold our center, stand firm, and allow whatever occurs to penetrate to our deepest core. As we do this, the wisdom of these times can arise within us, free of external dictates and the imposition of a narrative shaped by those voices that shout the loudest.

We may not, however, want to hear this wisdom right away. It may challenge too many cherished truths and blow apart too much of what feels like ‘me’. But hear it we must. For, if nothing else, these times call for the unyielding courage to see life through eyes that refuse to turn away no matter how challenging the truths perceived.

If we do nothing else, we must at least make a note of insights at this time for they will surely form an intrinsic part of our life from here on in, despite any struggle to embrace them.

Refusal to acknowledge the knot of wise apprehension in our stomach, or the sterile unhappiness of a life out of balance, deadens our senses and separates us from the unified field in which we each occupy our own unique space, as does allowing others to dictate what our feelings should be.

To return home to oneself in this way is an act of great power in an age when so much distracts us from doing so. Silence calls us now, not to shut out the world, but to understand it anew.

All eclipses shut something down, taking away elements of our lives no longer true for us. Some of us may feel restricted under this aspect, or even physically uncomfortable. If we are feeling the latter, some adjustment may be needed.

We should ask ourselves where we feel the discomfort, and how we can fix the issue. Personal comfort is a strong theme for Cancer, when this combines with the vision of Aquarius, we are encouraged to reinvent and change things up.

The old ways won’t work anymore, this is our opportunity to create new ones. We may feel tired, restless, scattered, or have a hard time focusing. But, if we take a moment, slow down, and move past the clouds, we can better see our path and vision, which we’ll need to. Over the next 5+ years we will go through endings while finding more appropriate ways to do our “Being in the Cancer Arena” of life.

Cancer is the sign representing our ability to act in our “enlightened self-interest” based in our instinctual understanding of experience.

Cancer is archetype of the Mother. She is the cosmic womb from whence we all emerge, and the Feminine energy that lives within each of us, regardless of gender.

She rules the emotions, and this period of time is unearthing many deep emotions along with core trauma that many of us have experienced. There is a lot being unburied as the tectonic plates of our world shift.

Compassion is what is needed to be seeded this Eclipse. This empathic Mother seed will have reverberations for months to come, as we continue on this journey of our evolutionary turning.

The healing salve is to allow, listen, and integrate; uphold the dignity of the human spirit; and lean into Her enveloping love, compassion and empathy for ourselves and others who are hurting.

Cancer, symbolically personified as the crab, carries Her home with her. Symbolically She is always home. She belongs.

Like Capricorn, it is the Wisdom of our ancient primal Innocence, where we instinctively know how to care for the roots which will flower in the future, and how to understand the Wisdom needed in each moment to nurture what we care for and find security in our “shell of personality.”

A Solar Eclipse in Cancer takes away old habits, self-indulgences, and insecurities, creating space to adopt better habits and a greater sense of security; old needs give way to new things we care about;
old insecurities give way to new ways of being a caring individual in our world;
old things we once clutched at or got defensive about give way to a new sense of giving and receiving in an open faith that all are being nourished appropriately;
old personality structures are replaced with new emotional connectedness with personal power and expertise.

[You’re going to need this:
The “umbra” is the darkest part of the shadow cast during an eclipse, the central cone of darkness which tapers away from the Earth or Moon, while
the “penumbra” is the outer cone of partial shadow on the outsides of the umbra on either side of the complete eclipse.]

Because this Eclipse lasts 5 hours and 48 minutes from start to finish of both sides of the penumbral phase, it’s of fairly long duration, so that translates in Astrological terms to an impact of 5 years and 9+ months.

The umbral phase, the central core, the darkest part where the eclipse will be most intense, lasts 3 hours 45 minutes, translating in Astrological terms to effects of the heart of the eclipse to last 3 years and 9 months.

As the magnitude is fairly strong, it’s powerful, and it will be most felt where it’s visible in Asia, the Middle East, southeastern Europe, and northeast Africa. specifically a path involving Ethiopia, Yemen, Oman, Pakistan, Kashmir, Tibet, the heart of China, and Taiwan.

So, don’t know if you know, our orbit around the sun is sort of level. The orbit of the moon around us is sort of tilted, it ascends and descends. Then, if we imagine the invisible trail the sun leaves in its orbit, and we imagine the invisible trail the moon leaves in its orbit, the point where they intersect on their paths is called a “node,” there are two of them. Climbing on its ascent is considered the “north node” [and in Vedic astrology, the north ascending node is called "Rahu” (the mythology has it as a dragon’s head) and on its decent it's called "Ketu” (and it’s symbolized as a dragon’s tail)].

The general astrological theory behind the significance of the Nodes suggests that we all have some underdeveloped and overdeveloped aspects in our character.

The Nodes point us to these specific qualities:

the South Node, when the moon is lazily on it's descent, suggests our overdeveloped character traits, our lazy, fall-back positions, the knee-jerk reactions we have, our often mostly unattractive go-to postures, those personality mannerisms which very may well undermine our lives, they certainly do our development, if we hold on to these traits just because we're lazy, just because we need to feel security, and, often in reality, just because we can't let go or won't get off our ass to better ourselves.

the North Node suggests the qualities that we need to develop (as we climb) in order to find inner balance, to reach our potential, to better ourselves and thus, to better the world.

The Nodes can also suggest personal karmic imbalance. If we over-emphasize and fall back on the qualities of our South Node, for instance, at the expense of developing our North Node, we may have a difficult time feeling personally successful, to say nothing of having any feelings of general accomplishment.

Whether or not we consciously work on these lessons, events in our lives are likely to force us to confront them at one time or another, so why don’t we take scheduled inventories to clean ourselves up throughout the year, hmm?

Tonight, the North Node, Raku, is in Gemini, and the challenge is to grow into a greater quest for knowledge. Being open to a greater quest for knowledge can give us spiritual and monetary wealth or influence in the future. Raku’s climb also challenges us to cultivate higher standards of expression, and encourages us to learn how to give and receive information in ways that don’t create dualities or power struggles. We are also on a quest to find higher values, and we need to accept the blessings if we are offered new Truths and futures.

When descending in South Node, Ketu in Sagittarius helps us discard and eliminate old truths, old philosophies, and old visions of the future. Ketu can also give us opportunities to express the growing understanding of Gemini energy of Raku through forms of demonstrating our willingness to “raise the bar.” Whatever is cleared out during the cleansing of the South Node’s descent will over time attract new forms of Gemini expression and activities.

This Eclipse will move us through major “forks in the road of destiny” due to aspects involving Moon, Jupiter, Uranus, and Pluto on the one hand, and Saturn and Neptune in an entirely different life area. It seems that we have many hard adjustments and sacrifices in life areas that will help clear a path to the greater future, but whatever is taken away will yield a void which will be opening new standards of excellence, new levels of self-demonstration, and new ideals to emulate and value.

This all culminates at the “Grand Mutation” at 1 Aquarius in December when Saturn is joined by Jupiter at 1 Aquarius, ushering in a 20 year Aquarian period AND a 200 year Air era! Ahhhh…

As this Eclipse falls on the Solstice, you can bet many things will be shut down quick and fast, given the strong Cardinal sign emphasis. This will be an “actional spiritual” Eclipse, marking the end of old familiarities and significant voids created in our personal life.

This Eclipse ushers in an extremely intense and compressed period when we have spiritual powerhouses Jupiter, Saturn, and Pluto all within a 6+ degree span. This marks the entry into the second Jupiter conjunct Pluto, indicating another “expansion of Pluto” in the world.

No doubt the virus will accelerate (15 days after The Tulsa Rally tonight is the next new moon), the cry for a better world will continue, and the spotlight will force movement which will serve the structures we’ll need in the future.

This Eclipse will remove many old assumptions, habits, and ways of living our everyday lives so we may accept a greater role in our world based in whatever vision was launched in our lives in late March or April.

As Mercury is retrograde, expect returns, reviews, renewals, and reconsiderations focused on how to make our spiritual life “more real.” Mercury is always so gracious about giving us another chance to go over our notes, and finish our homework.

This Solar Eclipse will show us it’s time to “lower one flag and raise a new one,” moving into new relationships, new ways of life, new concerns, and new ways of taking care of ourselves and others.

This puts the world on the threshold of nonstop intense friction and open conflict for many months. Some will abandon old allegiances; others will see they need a new direction to stabilize their lives.

We’re still spinning in the midst of the groundswell which at the end of the storm will yield a new life for everyone in 2021. This gives us a new look at what we care about and the habits we need to reconsider as we search for new knowledge.

So we stand at a turning point in the destiny of the world and humankind, when much is irrational and new consecrations are offered to us all. We must go our own way, value each individual’s response to life within a greater compassion for the human condition, not allow self-indulgent or presumptuous people to move us, and keep our eye on the “Great Work” we and others are beginning to build.

This is all cobbled together from Komilla Sutton, John Wilkinson, Mystic Mamma, Divine Harmony, Sarah Varcas, Mystica Madrake Root, and AstroLada.